A Helpful Hint

Yes, helping friends in delicate situations is sketchy at best and hard to navigate, but let me give you a tip or two of what not to do and say.

-say "its better you find out now then later on" I get the sentiment of this statement, but its really not helpful to be honest and doesn't do much

-if you don't like the person or haven't thats fine, but telling them that is not helpful either. Unless that friend lets you know that "hey i hate them and i hate their guts" odds are they don't, so revealing that "we all hated them all along" actually is the furthest thing from comforting. All that says is, oh gee thanks for being supportive I suppose, but its nice to know that had it worked out we'd just be that couple that, oh we like you, but man is their wife a bitch and we hate her. Glad to know that's the life we'd be living.

-closely related to that is informing them in so many words "we weren't supportive because we collectively decided that you were making a huge mistake with your life and we didn't like it". So glad to know that your friend's life is now your responsibility to mend and control to your needs and wants. By all means dont think about what they want, no no.

There are a billion of em I could say sure, but hey if ever faced with needing to help a friend, do them a favor and avoid those three at least. They'll thank you for it eventually.